Rules of dating for muslims dating a renaissance man
I grew up idolising women like Sarah Connor, Ripley from Aliens and, Goddamnit, even Mary Poppins.Exposure to such strong female role models and, more notably, my own fiercely intelligent and academically accomplished mother, charged me with the most profound yearning to have a more deliberate hand in my future.Dating before marrying my husband taught me compassion and respect for other people.It taught me how to be emotionally available and to respect my own values and principles as well as the values and principles of others. Food, conversation, my possessions and, eventually, my heart.Well, thanks for tuning in folks, you may now unbuckle your seatbelts and go about your day.Next time we shall be tackling Conundrum the Second- So, I’m Ok with dating, now what?I can identify with Pakistani culture as well as the culture and traditions of the religion I was raised in but; I do enjoy a good whiskey, used to smoke like a chimney, I collect really rubbish songs on vinyl like Bruce Willis’ timeless classic “Respect Yourself”, I love to knit, I make a killer steak and kidney pie and, like many other women in the UK, karaoke bars are also my secret shame.You may say that I am as western as they come but I am still so proud of my heritage and the culture and tradition my parents brought me up in.
So, once I overcame my diffident ways and grew more comfortable around boys my age, one of my absolute favourite things to do was go on dates.I often liken the South Indian approach to dating to Georgian Britain. It is no wonder then that, when it comes to the world of dating, the Modern Muslim is left rather flummoxed.It’s all about reputation and one’s family and parental interference is a welcome and common occurrence. As much as I do love the old country, demure wafty fan way of doing things, I was always a headstrong little girl.For many Muslims singles dating can be a difficult balance between their own wants and those of their family or society.Muslim blogger The Imposter has first hand experience of the conflicts which can arise between the search for love and the pressures of tradition.
As Muslims, we don’t tend to come from a dating culture so, if you are quite liberal and want to explore western conventions whilst still respecting your roots, there isn’t really a right and wrong here.